The world of mainstream rap is a tragic one. Becunted oafs like Kanye West and 50 Cent march around yammering on about girls 'n' guns over tedious, soulless beats. And don't even get me started on this fucking ridiculous auto-tune craze. You know how stupid Kriss Kross seem now? (They wore their clothes backwards.) In ten years time that's how people will think of T Pain.
Luckily, if you look a bit deeper there's a lot of really good stuff going on in hip hop. Q Tip (from A Tribe Called Quest) brought out The Renaissance, one of the best albums of last year, MF Doom is back with Born Into This and a new Dre album is on the way.
New Bohemia, Leeds' finest promoters of hip hop etc, have had a hell of a year. They've been celebrating their fifth birthday in style with line ups including The Herbaliser, Bonobo, Mr Scruff, Flying Lotus, Horace Andy and the actual Wailers, as in Bob Marley and the… Pretty impressive. Now they're putting on the Soundwave festival in Petrcane, Croatia.
Soundwave is a three day shindig full of hippety hoppity goodness taking place from the 17th – 20th of July on the Adriatic Coast. The festival site has an outdoor amphitheatre for live acts, a beachside terrace, a nightclub and a party boat for maritime shenanigans. They've got a Funktion One Soundsystem (which everyone goes on about as if it's the answer to something) and a pretty stonking line up prepared. Highlights include:
Fire up good old Youtube and search for 'Wearing My Rolex Mills McCartney' to get an idea of the sort of inspired silliness Yoda brings to his Magic Cinema Show. Interestingly, he isn't named after Yoda from Star Wars. He actually he takes his name from Jeff Yoda, the man who invented chair legs.
Her recent album is the really rather good Pot Of Gold and she lent her voice to Mr Scruff for Music Takes Me Up, the big tune from Ninja Tuna. Alice is a keen fan of vintage pencil cases and spends most of her weekends at various collectors' fairs around the Tenby area.
The Ninja Tune duo are putting on an AV bonanza. Their rider demands include a selection of dressing up costumes and one of each flavour of Pot Noodle.
I love this guy. The ex Jurassic 5 roadie's first album Music for the Mature B-Boy is a classic. Have a listen to his Fabriclive mix to get a good idea of the sort of hip hop, funk and soul he plays out. Format stunned his fans recently by signing a four-year contract to be the face of Tena Lady.
Thomas Middleton (baptized April 18, 1580, died 1627) was a playwright and poet. His best-known plays are the tragedies The Changeling and the cynically satirical city comedy A Chaste Maid in Cheapside. It is also widely believed that he collaborated with Shakespeare on various scenes in Macbeth.
The LA based beat fiend hasn't been confirmed yet, but rest assured the Soundwave team are trying their very hardest to get him. Fun fact: His name is inspired by the Back to the Future film series. After seeing Doc Brown's time-travelling Delorean, he decided he'd rather have a flying Lotus.
Is currently working on a collaboration with the Jonas Brothers, tentatively entitled BonoboJoBro.
The Glaswegian munchkin is one of the most hotly tipped new producers at the moment, check his remix of Zomby's Spliff Dub for further evidence. He said in a recent interview that he didn't think the internet 'would catch on as a concept'.
Vadim is a youthful looking fellow, and he actually got to the last five in the auditions to play Harry Potter in the film series.
Like his father, Evel, KidK is allergic to that silver stuff you scratch off on instant win lottery tickets.
This is a mere taste of the full line up, which is set to include The Bays, Daedalus, Trojan Sound System, Lizzie Parks, Natural Self, Jon Kennedy, DJ Cheeba and loads more. Be there or be somewhere else.